Thursday, April 28, 2005

Busted Out...Again...

So I've gone bust again. I had built my initial bankroll of $100 up to $750 before it all came crashing down. It's funny how it only takes a few bad beats to nullify the hours of effort and work you put into building up your money.

But I think I'm over-attributing my early success to skill. It's true that I made some right moves at the right time, but it's even more true that my cards were hitting and my favorites were holding up. This was probably luck at this point. But as soon as the cards started turning bad, I wasn't able to hang on and play it out correctly. I ended up losing it all. As Harrington says in Harrington on Hold'em, "Anyone can win a pot when he flops a monster. It's how you play when you don't flop one that will decide whether you're a winner or a loser."

Usually, when I bust my bankroll (not that it happens constantly...this is my third time in my poker career), it took me a long time to overcome the emotional turbulence. I would have to step away from the games for about a month in order to gain my confidence back and start over again. But strangely, this time around, I'm actually ready to get back into it. Sure, I was upset for one night. But I feel like today's a new day.

This either means that I've grown and matured as a player, and I accept the ideas of variance and "bad luck" more or that I've become addicted to gambling. I hope it's the former and not the latter.

Either way, even though I feel emotionally ready to play, I think I'm going to take a few days off. My orders from have just arrived (as can be evidenced by the Harrington quote), so I think it's best to spend some time reading and learning before I play again.

Time for more study.


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